18 Weeks
by Leslet
Summary: A short vignette to fill the gap until we get a new episode. Luby. New Luka Chapter Added!
1. Abby

_18 Weeks_

Author: Leslet

Disclaimer: Don't own a thing…yadda yadda.

Spoilers: To 12-14

_23 March 2006_

God, she needed a cigarette. A year ago it would have been second nature, as she

entered the cold Ambulance Bay, to defend herself against a wave of stress with sweet

sweet nicotine. That first breath of polluted air, that feeling of relief. Oh, how she

missed it.

It wasn't, of course, an option. She hasn't smoked in almost 10 months, almost a

year. She thinks, with no real intention, that she may throw a celebratory party when

she reaches that milestone. Its not a very good idea, in two months time she knows

she'll be in a constant cycle of apprehension, anxiety and backache. Not that she isn't

full of the first two already and she dreads the latter. At least, she thinks, with a surge

of a feeling she doesn't remember ever feeling about anyone else, that Luka will rub

her back and calm her fears. She fears, as much as she is reluctant to admit it, that

this might just be love.

She shudders at the cliché. She realises finally, at age 38, that love might just be the

way he clears her mind of those nagging voices that tell she is not good enough, not

strong enough, that she will be a terrible mother. He contradicts these things as she

finds herself voicing them and for the first time in 31 years, it doesn't go through one

ear and out the other, urged on by years and years of failure, resentment and guilt but

instead buries itself deep within her mind, where she knows she will remember it

when it is most important.

Perhaps, she muses. Real love is the way she feels, late at night when she lies

spooned against Lukas chest and she feels his hand as it rests unconsciously, so

naturally, on the curve of her stomach, which is now growing at an alarming rate. She

knows people at work are definitely noticing, well those that aren't already aware.

Morris keeps eyeing her stomach and making sly comments about '_cutting out the _

_doughnuts'_, though she knows she doesn't need to worry about him telling anyone

and simply mouths a word that looks a lot 'Albright' and may just be a threat.

Neela knows too but, busy with her surgical elective, she's rarely around long enough

for any kind of conversation with anyone. And Luka has told Sam; she feels almost

guilty, knowing how it feels to have an ex-lover move on in such an unexpectedly

permanent way. She thinks of Carter and wonders if he has married Kem yet,

remembers the secret jealously she had felt at their situation when he had returned to

Chicago, she thinks with refreshing clear-headedness, that she hasn't felt that way

about Carter in a long time. She still thinks of him occasionally, and hopes he has a

brighter future ahead of him that in no way reflects his dismal history.

She glances at her watch, her shift was over 5 minutes ago and Luka is late. Today is

the day the big announcement is to be made. At 18 weeks she's pretty sure they can't

wait any longer.

She notices him immediately as he rounds the corner. She knows his walk. She

senses his smile. He speeds up as he notices her waiting. Enveloping her in a bear

hug and lifting her off her feet as he reaches her. Suddenly she is not a day over the

age of 16.

He kisses her. Looks into her eyes. He's missed her. She's missed him too. And in

a synchronised move that challenges the Figure Skating at the Olympics. They turn,

hands clasped together, to face the music, and boy, they will dance.

_fin _

To sappy? Very possibly! But please let me know! Thanks!


	2. Luka

18 Weeks. Luka

She's looking at herself in the mirror again. He remembers lying in this exact position watching Sam as she fixed her hair in that exact mirror, blonde hair beautifully styled, frowning as she pulled at the invisible flaws she saw in her face. It's different when Abby looks at that shiny glass; she's not looking at her face at all.

He smiles. She's smiling again. Its one of those uncontrollable grins that you try with all your might to fight against but never win. He wants to get up and join her, hug her from behind, be close to her. But he knows there will be time to be close to her later on and maybe admiring her from afar is the perfect way to stop himself taking any second of this for granted.

Besides, the moments like this aren't as rare as they used to be. In their first failure of a relationship he doesn't remember her smiling more than a dozen times in a year. Now he's lost count of the times she's smiled, its not even smiling a lot of the time, it's beaming. She's glowing. When he tells her this she complains that's because she's got the skin of a teenager. He tells her she's glowing inside too. She claims she must be radioactive then, all those x-rays she says. He lets out a laugh from his belly and reaches forward to disturb her from her self-inspection. Pulling her towards him, kissing her forehead.

She leans into him.

"I'm getting fat"

It's a simple statement. He remembers Daniella saying it more than once. He rolls his eyes. He's heard it from Abby copious times already. He tells her she's beautiful and he knows she doesn't believe him, but she'll accept this compliment just because it's from him.

She _is_ beautiful. They're discovering a bigger belly every morning when they wake up. He hasn't been so contented with hearing the alarm clock in a long time, finds himself waking up before it, loves that in a few months they'll wake up and meet their new child everyday. The prospect awakens butterflies, ones that won't leave his stomach for a while, as he thinks about what he or she will look like. He hopes they look like Abby. He wants a beautiful baby with her eyes and her courage. He already knows they will have her love.

He wonders if it will be a little girl. At thoughts like this he inevitably thinks of Jasna. The butterflies leave him momentarily as he thinks of his children. He wonders what they would think about of having a little brother or sister. He wishes he could tell them. He doesn't wish they were here because now he realises that all the wishing wells in the world wouldn't being them back to him. This is his life now. He feels almost guilty that for the first time in a long time, he doesn't compare one to the other and think that things can never be as good as they were before. He knows things will never go to back to how they were. But he is finally happy with what God is handing him now. He has Abby. She turns out to be the very thing he needed all along. He has needed her for so long.

She thinks they're going to have a boy. He's not so sure. In many ways he doesn't mind, because they will still be half of him and half of her.


End file.
